Big Brother

Jon nudged the pipe out of the way with the kitchen knife. "First of all, signs are excuses, and I don't like excuses--especially when they're lame. Second of all, don't call me sweetie."

Emerald compared their two weapons.

"Mine is longer than yours. Mine is sharper than yours. And I can use mine better.

Please, leave."
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<em>AzurEmerald</em>- Oh, okay.

"OK! ENOUGH!" K.B jumped out from behind the couch and ran to the two. And rather stupidly jumped in between the two. "No hurting each other. Stop being immature. Or god help me I will let Lari burn your rooms."

Jon smirked. "Fine, fine, we don't need two cranky, sex-mad morons in the house." After he trotted up the stairs, he went to the garage and found a screwdriver and began to unscrew the hinges to the basement door.

Emerald hit his working hand soundly.

"It's going to be a lot harder to have my privacy this way."

He paused.

"Unless you want to see me prance around naked....."
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<em>AzurEmerald</em>- We both know that you want it.

"Not particularly!" Jon called down the stairs as he finished working on the first hinge. "I just want to make your life hell!"

"Just warn us before you get naked, kay?" Nefnee called. "I don't wanna see any of dat," she told Yeti.

"A, I'm right next to you. I did just hit your arm. Don't yell.

B, You try to make my life hell and I'll make yours hell, sweetie. And I have much more practice in hellfire and brimstone than you do.

C," he said as he unbuttoned his shirt, "I might as well start stripping now and give you a taste of what you're going to experience."

"NO NO NO KEEP IT ON!!!" Nefnee cried.

K.B grimmaced. "Ew. Yeah. Please warn a girl. No need to burn images into our poor heads. But I am sure Jon wont mind much"

"You're right, KB," Jon said as he realized that his working hand was numb as soon as Em hit it. (<_<) "I won't mind; I'll have gouged my eyes out long before he finishes taking it all off."

"Well, then. Either drop the screwdriver and get away from my door or start clawing your eyes out."

Emerald already finished with his shirt and started unbuckling his belt.

Jon sighed resignedly. "Fine, fine." He dropped the screwdriver in such a way that it sent the screws spinning wildly in various directions--one went down the basement, one under the couch, and one down the hall. The rest of the screws remained in place in the hinges.

"Good job, Jon.

Now fix the door and I'll put my clothes on."
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<em>AzurEmerald</em>- Shut up, girl!

"Please hurry up, Jon," Nefnee cried covering her eyes.

"What's going on?" Lari asked as she emerged from her closet fort. "Mr. Fluffyfeet and I are confuzzled," she added as she hugged her stuffed unicorn.

"Em's just being grouchy," Jon replied. "Look, if you can find the screws--" he kicked the screwdriver down the cellar stairs and then continued, "--and the screwdriver, I'll fix your door. And by "I'll" I mean you will."

"Otay then," Lari surveyed the room in general. "Wait....if we can break down Em's door...why can't we bust down the front door as well?"

"I don't know," Jon said, "but if it were that easy to get out, I doubt they would've locked us in here in the first place; let alone with an instruction manual. AJ said the kitchen gets restocked every few weeks; we could wait for the deliverymen or whoever comes to give us supplies to arrive, and then slip out."

"Or..." Lari said, thinking. "We could burn down the door and find this Julie chick."

"Finding Julie will be hard," Jon said, walking aimlessly around the living area. "She's probably gone--far away, too. I'm sure she knows how angry we'll all be...eventually...Em, put your damn clothes on."

"Why didn't we think to put a tracker or some shit on her?" Lari asked, facepalming. "Now we're going to have to do this the hard way..."

Em walked up the stairs, giant rod in hand.

"I'll do it in a minute."

He went up to the door for Jon's room and started hitting it until he heard a resounding crack coming from it. He then went to the staircase to the basement and put on his shirt.

"There we go. Everything's fixed now."

Em took a book from the shelf and sat down on the couch.
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<em>AzurEmerald</em>- Not really.

Jon grinned at Em and disappeared into the basement for a few moments until he reappeared at the top of the stairs with the screwdriver in his hand. He removed the remaining screws from the basement door's hinges, pocketed them, and carried the detached door upstairs. There was a loud clatter, and after a few minutes a white door with chipped paint and a split in its center came tumbling down the stairs into the hallway where it landed with a satisfying -thud-. Jon came down the stairs, stepping over the door as if it weren't really there, and began searching for the missing screws. He found two, and then gave up and began walking back upstairs.

"Oh, well," he said, "Maybe two hinges are enough."

"Boiiii... you been whored!" Nefnee called gangsta-like.